amara surashakta, authorpreneur

"To gain your own voice, you have to forget about having it heard." – Allen Ginsberg

About Me

AMARA SURASHAKTA

WRITER, RUNNER, MARTIAL ARTIST

 

Accept the struggles that embrace your life. They are there to help you find your strengths.

 

I am an American fantasy/science fiction writer who has not mastered the “about me” section, as you can see.

I stepped away from what I thought was my only passion (law) and found this amazing world that never stops producing new found elements of education, creation, and wonder.

I  have found my passion in what started off as a NaNoWriMo piece and has since expanded into multiple worlds and characters, all of which have captured my heart.

My writing group, Kenosha Writers Guild, has allowed me to experience editing and copyediting. With their assistance, I discovered how much I enjoy working with fellow writers, sharing knowledge of the craft, and seeing a fledgling piece grow into a mastered work of art.


BA-Political Science-Legal Studies, BA-Criminal Justice, Minor-Philosophy

VISIT MY SITES!

http://portaltoatala.wordpress.com/

https://www.facebook.com/MindingMyMuse

http://about.me/amarasurashakta


ROAD TO RECOVERY

It’s Not How You Start or Finish,

It’s Everything In-between

 

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Today might be the last day hanging out with my 12 friends. I’m nerva-cited as my daughter says. I’m as nervous as I am excited. It’s been 3.5 weeks! The area is getting itchy and tight – so tight that when the wrist bends it feels like the sutures are cutting into my skin.

Sutures 7 22 2014 picmonkey

As I waited in the exam room, I started to worry that today might actually NOT be the day my sutures would be removed – saw the nurse, sat in an exam room instead of the tech room (I never learned it’s actual name, but the tech was always awesome). My heart sank a little bit, and I was actually sad. As much as I feared having my first ever set of stitches removed, I realized I really was ready to see them go. Then I saw the doctor and was told “See ya in two weeks. Oh, they didn’t take your sutures out? Did they even ask if you had any? Let’s go.” Time to say good-bye.

Cutting the threads hurt more than expected but pulling them out hurt less than I expected. Oddly, I was surprised to see blood. Not that I should have been surprised but I sat there looking at my arm and thought “Huh, there’s blood.” I now have these lovely stickers – the kids always get cartoons on their stickers, but this is what mine look like. I was told to relax for the week so that the wounds could heal without gallons of disgusting sweat pouring into them. After a poor performance run yesterday and my husband being on call (so no transportation to a gym, etc.) it might be a good idea. On the up-side after healing up I can hit the pool!

No More Sutures picm1 MONTH SINCE THE DATE OF THE ACCIDENT!


Monday, July 21, 2014 MONDAY MOTIVATION! Love it – time to go out and hit the pavement! Monday Motivation


Saturday, July 19, 2014 robot

Tai Chi anyone?

I know, what does that have to do with a robot? Please, read on. During my last appointment with my fabulous orthopaedic surgeon I asked if I could start Tae Kwon Do again. I knew what his answer would be; however, I wanted a feel for how long I’d be benched. His answer? “Not for a while.” Gah…no date! “Not for a while” translates – at least in my head – to months down the road. Doesn’t he know how hard it is to just sit and watch my daughter complete her classes? We always take class together! The connection I have to the school is already starting to feel foreign. I stuck with other sitters – the mothers, fathers, grandparents, spouses, etc. of my fellow classmates. Does he know I have to hear ridiculous comments when I sit there? But…I don’t want another surgery, no starting over for me. So I need options. “Not for a while” also translates to “what was I going to do with my contract?” If I knew I’d be benched for a month then I’d just pay the fee and have the month tacked onto the end of the contract, but I’m not even allowed to drive yet. So I offered my husband my contract, and he started Krav while I started Tai Chi, which is a la carte. I loved my first lesson. As expected, I moved my wrist in ways daily life didn’t incorporate, in ways my physical therapy was suppose to support. (I hate physical therapy. Of all people, I shouldn’t, but I do.) Each movement is slow, relaxed and with purpose, which is exactly what I need. However, as my mother put it, I looked like a robot – Thanks Mom! So I have a week to practice before my next session to figure out how to relax, how to unlearn my rigid TKD training, and how to look less…like a robot. I’m okay with this because each practice session includes the physical therapy work I hate so much. Score! Later that day I led the normal TKD practice session with my daughter and another fellow classmate at my gym. I joined in when we reviewed our forms to begin a checkpoint for how my body currently looks vs. what my body used to look like (and will again look like with time). I have the visual goal I need and the methods for getting it there.


Thursday, July 17, 2014 Hard earned 3.5 miles today! However, I ran a new path and found a nature preserve in my backyard (who knew – good thing I’ve lived here almost a decade!). Ponytail is old hat now. I’ve even tried different bands and making tighter holds without issue – woot! 🙂


Wednesday, July 16, 2014 I tried sleeping without my brace last night. It was my first attempt, but I spent the entire day without it (even when I went out and about). Unfortunately, I woke up in some serious pain at 2am. I tried gritting through it for 30 minutes then gave in to my prescription pain meds 😦 This morning is rough as well.


Monday, July 14, 2014 I put my hair up in a ponytail today! I made a ponytail! This has been a goal since last Tuesday! I tried two other times this week and failed (once miserably, once meh). Today, I got it up twice – happy dance! 🙂 My daily goal will be to to this with less pain every time (because this accomplishment came with its fair share). I also managed an entire night without medication to help me along!


July 13, 2014 Rough day – woke up stiff and uber sore. It’s a reminder of my training – when you push, push, push through a hard week your body cries; the benefit of the pain comes shortly thereafter. I washed my own cut today, cleaned up, even straightened my hair alone. Doesn’t make my frustration level any easier though 😦


July 12, 2014 Bah! 2.75mi (thought I kicked out 3 – time to prep route beforehand) – heart happy.


July 11, 2014

FIRST RUN SINCE JUNE 21ST!

HERE I GO!

shoesI missed my shoes! Made just under 3 miles (2.87mi.)

Physical heart started fluttering – not effing with that. I understand stop.


July 9, 2014

This is a huge accomplishment – I dressed myself without help!

dressed myself ipiccy pm


Tuesday, July 8, 2014 Appointment with Dr. Schmelling – terrified. I don’t know if I’m ready to have my stitches out yet. Good news is, they were left in. Dr. Schmelling knows exactly what to remind me of – you’re not going to break anything I fixed. You’re ahead of the game, but it’s time to lose the beer can hand. Go to Physical Therapy. Don’t be fooled – the exercises are trying. I’ll be reminding myself no pain, no gain for a while I think. Had Reese take pictures of Day 1 status:

This is what I have to beat – improvement here I come. May the pain lessen!

Week 1 PT


Tuesday, July 1, 2014

PLAYGROUND BUILD DAY!

I hope you guys didn’t think I had the luxury of just sitting around when I had a playground to build.

Oh yes, I had the fortune of chairing Paris Consolidated School’s playground committee. We had a Design Day where we brought in kids or create their dream playgrounds then the adults brainstormed the perfect options to buy. Some first choices didn’t work out – too expensive, not safe. However, we hit the ground running today and ended the day with something I think the kids will like come the first day of school (or at least I hope so).

playground 1 fotor


Saturday, June 28, 2014

REESE’S RACE – I said I was going to be there, and I was 🙂

Reese Race

Toby and I walked around Lake Andrew and found a shady spot at about the halfway point to cheer on Reese and all her friends, my friend Karyn and all the other runners. They did a fabulous job!

Then I was still feeling good enough to go to our Tae Kwon Do picnic! Toby had grill duties so we arrived early. I pretty much sat on my butt and talked to everyone, which was odd because I’m used to helping out instead. Spent the majority of the day there and had a great time. It was nice to get out of the house and hear about surgery stories from other people.

Oh…and nice to EAT!

I didn’t get one of these, but they were cute.

cookies fotor

We had fun at the dunk tank and had a great Demo Team presentation.

TKD picnic


Friday, June 27, 2014

LOOK WHAT CAME WHEN I WAS IN SURGERY!

proof

One of my kids noticed the delivery. I had forgotten my proof was even coming so the find was a nice surprise. As always, the first page I flipped to I found an error – doh! I tried going through more; unfortunately, the medication I’m on plus the general anesthesia still coursing through my body makes getting anything done impossible. Did I mention I was supposed to be editing a book on this day? I couldn’t even keep my eyes open, which I was thankful for because when they were open my body did nothing other than shake…and shake…and shake – I could keep going here! It was miserable.


Thursday, July 26, 2014

SURGERY DAY!

Don’t let that exclamation mark confuse you. I’m terrified and have spent many hours these last couple of days crying mainly because I can’t convince myself to knock it off…it’s a common surgery…I have an amazing doctor…he’s the Director of Orthopedic Trauma. Of course, the phone call after phone call of surgery prep questions do not help nor does the fact that my mother-in-law passed away in heart transplant surgery. I tell myself that repairing a broken wrist is NOTHING like taking out one’s heart and putting in a new one, but that day still weighs heavily in my mind. I can’t shake it.

I’ve been told that waking up from surgery can feel amazing in that you feel so rested, and I’ve been told it crazy because you wake up missing hours of you life. What I found out I needed was my Tae Kwon Do tenets and a reminder. Or perhaps I should call it a goal. I got up in the middle of the night and wrote these on my split. I had spent hours training my daughter for her first 5K race. I screwed up the last week of training, but I was going to be there when she ran – no matter what. I probably would have fallen apart in the time after my surgery if I didn’t have that goal.

Preop SplintLast day I’ll see this. My tenets centered me. I chanted them a lot in my head. However, not even realizing it “courtesy” morphed into “courage,” which was fine – I needed that too. But, seeing my baby race after a month of training – that’s what pushed me. It was my main motivation and what grounded me to push through this. I’d especially need it in recovery. Toby and I played a number of Yahtzee games – the game let me win 🙂

This is my “gown.”

BeFunky_bear.jpg

My old WoW friends will get this 🙂

I took it as a good sign.

Recovery was miserable. I had day surgery…day surgery. I left for the hospital at 5:45am. Surgery was early and took 45 minutes. I do not remember going under although my husband said I made the usual happy to go out sounds. I told him to tape me coming out of anesthesia – that should be good for a laugh. Right?

I was in recovery until 8pm.

Now, let me start by saying I had THE BEST SURGICAL TEAM EVER.

I remember coming out of surgery. I needed to tell them what my pain scale was. 8? 9? It hurt, but I also rate my migraines as an 8, giving birth without pain meds got a 7. I assumed the pain would get worse…it was surgery…I was cut open. It was to be expected. I didn’t expect to get drugged up over and over. Tylenol would have been fine. Why did I tell them that high?I was out for who knows how long.

I don’t remember any pain in my arm when I woke again in recovery – eventually I came to wish for it. No, I wanted to exchange for it – I’d have taken miserable surgery pain for the “can’t open my eyes to comprehend my life” situation in a heartbeat. I was so drugged. It was worse than going through surgery while awake. I hated it. I tried waking up, tried getting up over and over and over – and failed. I heard the nurse tell my husband that I’d eventually have to get up or be admitted. I had until 7p. I tried harder and still failed. I remember taking a nausea pill but am not sure when I took it or why I needed it. I was forced up to the bathroom and forced into a chair (they took the bed – thank goodness although I really wanted it, sitting in the chair was exhausting – yes, exhausting). I barely got into the wheelchair, barely got into the chair, and sat with my head over a bucket with my eyes shut the entire way home. I don’t remember being home or the actions that came with being home. I remember not eating because I had no hunger then forcing myself to eat – anything. I remember trying to live in a chair in my living room and watch Arrow but sleeping through it all for days. I remember shaking…a lot. And calling the doctors because I wasn’t breathing properly. At times, I forgot to breathe. I wish I was joking about that. I spent a lot of time focused on making my lungs fill with air and trying to stop my everything from shaking. I stopped taking my pain medication. It took days for the shaking to stop. It took days to feel sort of normal.

But Saturday morning I was at my daughter’s race.

That’s all I wanted.


Wednesday, June 25, 2014

The night before my surgery it was time to pick out my “last meal.” If I had one last thing to eat, what would it be? Of everything I could choose from, I chose Olive Garden. I was too terrified to want anything heavy, but I didn’t want anything as light as fruit. Now, Olive Garden’s Chicken Gnocchi soup? Goldilocks said it would be “just right.” So, I went to it – ate three bowls and filled my belly with breadsticks too.

BeFunky_Last Meal.jpg


Tuesday, June 23, 2014

Time to see Dr. Schmeling!

Surgery 😦

Popping all sorts of cherries

First broken bone (toe doesn’t count)

First surgery

I have a million decision to make:

closed reduction or open reduction, twilight or general, nerve block or no nerve block

/boggle

My choice?

I’d like to have what River had in the episode of Doctor Who we watched. She broke the same wrist I did!

I should have married a Time Lord – Just Kidding!


Night of June 21, 2014 No idea what this means yet – cast or surgery. Either way, this wasn’t the plan for the day. In a split second my day went from the best ever to the worst ever. Night of June 21 xray Collage


Morning of June 21, 2014 My morning started at the Lighthouse Run 10-Mile – finished in 1H35m. Crossing the finish line was an experience I’ll never forget, and one that cannot be replicated. Two months of training paid off, and I wanted to rest up then go for a half marathon. Race Day pmThen I punched this guy… Failed Palm StrikeMy palm strike failed epically against that head.


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